HOOKERS, TESTICLES AND SNAKE

Day 4, March 25th

The night market.

Note to self:  Never let dad wonder off on his own again.

More on that later.

After the Great Wall, we rested and regrouped back at the hostel. 

Dad had heard about a night market that was a “must see.”  So off we go.  Masters of the Beijing subway, we were in the area of the night market in no time at all.  We wondered around a little bit until we found it.  And it was like nothing we had ever seen before.

Lots of scorpions.

Just about anything that could be bbq’d, roasted, grilled, fried, sautéed and served on a stick or in a paper boat was there for the eatin’.  Animals, fish, bugs.  All raw, skewered and ready to go.  I couldn’t believe it.

We wondered up and down the stalls, looking, watching, asking.  It was amazing.  Beef, chicken, squid, octopus, sea urchin, scorpion, tarantula, silk worm, shark, shrimp, crab, snake, calamari, baby bird, crawfish, crab, starfish, beetles, dog and more.

Seafood.

A few times we were stumped as to what we were looking at.  One particular time, mom walked up to ask what a certain skewered delicacy was.  Choosing not to employ her library voice, she turns around and says, “Kevin, these are testicles.  These are TESTICLES, KEVIN!”  Thanks, mom.  We all heard you.  Another time, a guy didn’t think I understood him as he was telling dad the same thing.  So, he walked around from behind the counter, pointed at my blueberries and blurts out, “Teh-sah-cols.  TEH-SAH-COLS!”  Yeah.  Thanks.  I got it everyone.  I know what we are talking about.  Chinese version of rocky mountain oysters.  And frankly, I’d prefer to quit talking about it.  Good Lord!

TEH-SAH-COLS!

After we made it down all of the stalls to see all that was on offering, we decided to delve in and try a bit.  Dad, stepping outside of his comfort zone, tried the beef.  Mom, feeling more daring, enjoyed a dangerous cantaloupe and strawberry fruit skewer.  I followed the lead of the locals and had a squid, a crab, a calamari and a snake skewer.  They weren’t too bad.  The chili sauce is pretty powerful and dominates the flavor.  It is the texture that is hard to get past, especially for the snake.  I’m good on snake.  Don’t need to try that again.

Eating Snake

While I was getting drenched in snake grease, dad was off wondering by himself.  And, apparently caught the eyes of a couple of hookers.  Their lead in line to him was, “you look familiar.”  Of course, you look familiar, dad.  You are in your 60’s, western and alone.  All of the qualities a hooker looks for in a relationship.  Now come back to the group and quit wondering off on your own.

Teh-sah-col-ly yours,

Skewered

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