A LEADER OF MEN

Day 27, April 17^th

We aren’t moving too fast this morning.  No need to.  I have already laid out the plans for the day and there is no need to rush.  Breakfast.  Beach.  Dinner.  Done.  That’s right, I said beach.

Ahhhh, yessss.  The Beach.  After the past couple of weeks in the cities, I am more than ready for the white sands and blue waters of the coast.

A pretty good view.

I know, the name Cambodia doesn’t exactly elicit thoughts of umbrella-dotted beaches and lazy days listening to the waves crawl up the sand and roll back out to sea.  Believe me, you are missing out.  Sihanoukville is just that, a beach town.  This is one of the more picturesque beaches I have seen.

Just above the row of water-front umbrellas lies restaurant after restaurant ready to bring you anything you desire from a Tiger beer to a mango smoothie to fresh grilled seafood.  I’m gonna dig this.

We make it down to one of the beach side restaurants for a quick breakfast.  It’s the usual.  I gotta say, frying eggs is not their thing here.  It always comes drenched in grease.  Literally.  When we first arrived in Southeast Asia the kids were ordering like it was an I-HOP and giving specifics about how the eggs should be prepared.  Over easy.  A little runny.  Not too hard.  Confusion.

They know two things when it comes to eggs on a western breakfast here.  Fried or scrambled.  And if it is fried, that basically means the eggs are going skinny dipping in a vat of grease and not drying off when they get out.  They will literally slide across your plate there is so much grease.  One full month starting off each day with a plate of grease and a side of egg has an effect.  It wreaks havoc on your digestive system.  I’ll leave it at that.

Grease ingested.  Coffee consumed.  Beach time.

We find a couple of umbrellas with lounges and set up camp.  With the Khmer New Year just ending, this place is quiet.  Hardly anyone out here.  Perfect.

An even better one.

I can’t say this enough, you hear Cambodia and you think jungle, war, Black Panther Beer, Angelina Jolie’s son.  You think anything BUT beach.

However, the sun is out.  The blue sky is gently dotted with a few clouds.  The sand is white.  The breeze is soft.  And the water from the Gulf of Thailand is cool.  This is what you want when you dream of that beach getaway.

I easily settle into relaxing.

Mom, easily settles in to relaxing.

Dad, he’s a good sport and gives it a try.

There is no escaping them.

We order up some fresh fruit smoothies and lay back and enjoy.  I toss on my ipod, scroll to Jack Johnson and close my eyes to relax.  This is absolute heave…EXCUSE ME MISSA, You buy bracelet from me?  Foot massage?  Very hairy chest missa, I fix for you?  Shrimp?  Fresh fruit?  Remember me for later, OK?  You buy from me later, OK?  We friends now!

This SUCKS!!

The beach hawkers are everywhere and relentless.  Selling everything.  But they don’t make the hard sell this early in the day.  It’s more of an introduction, a meet and greet, if you will.  The best thing to do this early is to just say ‘no’ unless you see something you want to buy right then. 

Mom commits the cardinal sin in interacting with hawkers while lounging.  She doesn’t say “no.”  She says “maybe later.”  “Maybe later” is basically a contract to them.  And make no mistake about it, they will be back to collect.  A couple of the hawkers, kids mostly, even throw out the pinky swear.  They know the routine and they are very good at it.

Not too long after the hawkers leave, Patton gets restless.  He often does when we are relaxing and we knew this would happen.  He heads off and walks up and down the beach.  Very little relaxing for him.

A young girl giving mom the hard sell.

The rest of the morning and early after noon is spent lounging, dipping in the ocean, flipping over and back over, an occasional massage, a few purchases from the hawkers, several mango smoothies and MANY refusals to have my chest hair threaded.  I don’t know why, but they wouldn’t let that one go.  Believe me, I’m no Magnum P.I., but they kept wanting to “fix” it.  Every time I said no, they would ask about my head.  Where did you leave your hair, missa?  I left it in my 20s.  Thanks for reminding me.  So much for relaxing.

As early afternoon approaches, the hawkers realize it is time for the hard sell.  The sun will be going down, people will be heading off to dinner and they need to close the deal now. 

About that time, Patton returns from his trek.  I would like to take this opportunity to say how much I admire Patton.  This guy is genuinely amazing.  The things he has accomplished in life constantly astound me.  The places he has taken our family to live.  Germany.  Saudi Arabia.  The places he has traveled solo to work.  Sudan.  Kuwait.  And all of the stuff he has done in recent years in Iraq and Afghanistan in helping to rebuild those countries.  He is always calm.  Collected.  Calculated.  He is truly a leader of men.  Always has everything under control. 

Except…

…when he is surrounded by several six-year-old beach hawkers shoving bracelets in his face and another lady giving him a “trial foot massage.”  He is squirming more than a tweener at a Justin Beiber concert.  This is funny.

Moving in on Patton.

All I can hear is …NO, I don’t want a massa.  Kevin!  NO, I don’t want any bracelets.  Kevin!!  Quit touching my feet!  NO, I don’t want any bracelets!  Kevin!!  Make them go away!!  NO, I don’t want any.  KEVIN!!  Pay them a dollar to leave me alone!!

I could help him out, I guess.  But, this is an extremely refreshing mango smoothie and I certainly don’t want to get in the way of him experiencing the local culture.  He can take care of himself.

A leader of men indeed. 

Once the hawkers finally split, the kids load up their stuff and head back to the hotel room.  I choose to take in a bit more sun while I can.  Bad call on my part.  A combination of bad decision-making and laziness have led to the worst sunburn I have ever had.  I have been out here for about 5-6 hours…and no sunscreen.  My initial thinking was I needed to start with a decent burn.  Once I realized I was too burned, I was too lazy to put on sunscreen or to get up and leave.  I think I am going to pay dearly for this.

Finally, I am ready to head back to the room and get ready for dinner.  But, I spot a hair band I want from one of the hawkers.  No, it isn’t for me.  The girl doesn’t have the color I want, so she sits there and makes a new one for me.

While she is making it a bunch of other kids come to chat and try to sell stuff to me.

The trolley.

One young girl in particular is upset.  Apparently, she feels that she and I are “friends” from this morning and I should be buying from her.  But I didn’t make “friends” this morning.  Great.  Now the tears are coming.  I try to chat with her and be playful.  She says I promised to buy.  I say I didn’t promise.  And then the switch flips and she hits me with it.  “I don’t want your f____n promises.  I want your money.”

WHAT?!?!

I don’t even have a response to that.  Now I’m dealing with a 6-year-old Andrew Dice Clay?  She is pissed!  That’s my cue.  I’m just gonna get the hair band and head back to the hotel.  Of course, she doesn’t let me leave without one last parting shot.  She tells me, “go back to your f____n country.”

They certainly master English at a really young age here.

My sunburn is killing me, but it is time to head out to dinner.  I heard about a restaurant, Chez Claude, that is a quick drive beyond the beach area that has great food and a trolley ride to the front door.  Sounds interesting.

That is a painful sunburn.

When we get there, we quickly understand why the trolley ride is one of the main attractions.  The trolley is raised up and down the steep incline by a farm tractor.

We must be the first ones there cause no one is manning the trolley.  The place doesn’t even look open.  Eventually, an old man walks out and after a few gestures and pointing we load up in the trolley and the tractor groans to life.  Surprisingly, a smooth ride.

The food is pretty good.  The sunset is beautiful.  But my sunburn is insufferable.  Time to head back to the hotel, bathe in aloe vera and spend the rest of the night regretting not putting on sunscreen.

Sunny side uply yours,

Higgins

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ALL IN THE FAMILY

Day 26, April 16^th

Today should be a relatively easy day.  Another travel day.  From the city to the beach.  Phnom Penh to Sihanoukeville.  I could use some beach time.  Phnom Penh has been pretty intense.  Aside from the two dark, heavy places we went to yesterday, the poverty here in Phnom Penh is bad.  Seems to be everywhere.

Working young.

Apparently for some people and families, poverty is a career.  Our Canadian hotel manager pointed out a group of kids that hoof it up and down the main street in front of the restaurants hawking bracelets, books, clothes and any other kind of souvenir they can get their hands on.  All of the kids are related.  Most of them are brothers and sisters.  Their mother continues to have kids and as soon as the kid can walk and hold souvenirs, the mother sends the child out to sell on the streets.  Two-years-old and they are already working.

The mother hangs out on the street, off to the side to monitor the kids.  Occasionally, the kids will break their sad façade and start to smile and play around like normal kids.  The mom quickly corrects them and puts them back to work.  It’s no way for a kid to grow up.

The city itself was pretty empty as a result of the Khmer New Year.  We expected it to be packed, but turns out it is the exact opposite.  Apparently, everyone in the cities go out to the country where they are from or take a big family vacation somewhere to celebrate the New Year.  Our Canadian friend has told us to expect the beach to be crowded for the first day or two we are in Sihanoukeville.  At this point, I don’t care.  I just want to be near the water.

This morning is status quo for the three amigos.  Mom and dad are ready to roll, early.  I am not.  Patton is already pacing.  So much pacing that it is making the Phnom Penh heat even hotter.  But, it is effective.  Cause when Patton starts pacing, Pyle starts packing.  I know, I shouldn’t wait to the last minute, but it is what it is. 

Phnom Penh bus station.

A quick tuk-tuk ride to the bus station, a short wait and we are on the bus and ready to hit the road.  Straight shot to the beach.  Should be easy and hopefully uneventful.

This kid sits in the seat next me.  I guess he isn’t that much of a kid considering he is married and has a kid of his own.  He shows me his little girl.  She’s a cutie and grabs my finger and shakes it.  I guess that makes us all family now.  And as family, I am now her dad’s pillow to sleep on for ride down to Sihanoukeville.  Greeeat.

Not too long into the drive he starts doing the head-bob/shoulder lean routine.  His head falls forwards, bounces up, lays to the side on my shoulder, slumber.  The bus hits a bump.  He barely wakes up.  Looks around.  Then…his head falls forwards, bounces up, lays to the side on my shoulder, slumber.  Over and over and over.  Plus, despite being smaller than I am, he is doing the wide leg spread, taking up way too much room.  At least this bus ride is only four to five hours.

View from the hotel.

Once we get to Sihanoukville, we are let out on the side of the road.  Seems odd, but there are taxis and tuk-tuks waiting for us.  I guess it is pretty common.  We grab a tuk-tuk and head down to the beach area.  I post the kids up at a restaurant and after a quick lunch I head out to find a place to stay.

Technically, the Khmer New Year is over.  But, not really.  Today is Saturday, tomorrow everyone heads back to the city.  As a result the prices for hotels are double for tonight and drop back to the normal rate tomorrow.  I hit up a couple places and they are all full for tonight.  I find one hotel that is the nicest on the beach.  Nicer than any of the others we have stayed at on this trip.  It is only a month or two old.  Still not even completed.  But the rooms are nice and the hotel is close to the water.  Plus, it is the only one with rooms still available.  Sold.

I grab the kids and we check in.

Happy New Year!!

Mom is tired tonight and doesn’t feel like heading out for dinner.  Plus, she is still fully stocked on her Weight Watchers snacks.  Just about every time she pulls one of those snacks out, she flaunts it in front of my face with an I-told-you-so look of satisfaction.

Dad and I heard the seafood on the beach is phenomenal.  We head out to verify for ourselves.  As we stroll up and down the beach, every 50 feet or so we are hit up by another restaurant/bar asking if we want to eat there.  The food does look good and pretty fresh, but it all looks the same.  We settle on a place, head to a table in the sand by the water, I kick my flip-flops off and we enjoy some freshly grilled Cambodian bar-b-cued seafood as the sun sets.

This place has a great vibe.  I’m gonna dig chilling here for a few days.

Shoulder pillowly yours,

The Family Man

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GENOCIDE

Day 25, April 15^th

Last night was kind of tough.  The A/C never really did anything and the fan made it just barely bearable.  I am beyond tired.  I don’t think the kids slept well either.  We are down early in the Irish Pub for a quick breakfast and then ready for the day.  Yesterday we arranged for a tuk-tuk driver for the day through our Canadian hotel manager.  Our driver is waiting for us and we are off.

Tuol Sleng.

Today is going to be an interesting day for me.  This is the first city we have been to on our trip that I visited when I was here in Southeast Asia back in 2002.  It will be interesting to compare the experiences and see the changes.  It is already obvious the city has grown quite a bit.

'Interrogation' rules.

As we wind through the streets, I am reminded that Cambodia is a beautiful and tragic country.  The people are amazing and the country is stunning.  But, Cambodia has suffered one of the greatest human rights tragedies of our time.  The people still suffer from it today.  It is all a result of their former leader, Pol Pot.

Pol Pot was the communist leader of Cambodia back in the 70s.  He was so afraid of uprisings and rebellion that he took the poor youth of Cambodia, enlisted them in the Khmer Rouge, gave them guns and a directive of genocide.  The Khmer Rouge wiped out all of the people Pol Pot feared would stand against him.  They killed all of the doctors, lawyers, professors, artists, musicians.  All of the intellectuals of society.  They practically killed off all of the older generations.  One thing that mom, dad and I notice is that there aren’t that many old people around.  No where near the number of old people we saw in Laos and Beijing.  Most of them were killed in the 70s.

As we wind through the streets, nothing is familiar to me.  I don’t recognize anything.  Then we make a few more turns and I recognize our first stop, Tuol Sleng, also known as S-21.

'Interrogation' room.

This is a really heavy place.  I can feel the weight of it.  Nothing but bad vibes here.  Tuol Sleng used to be a school back before the Pol Pot era.  Once Pol Pot came to power, Tuol Sleng was taken over and converted in to a security prison and interrogation center.  More accurately, a place where confessions of opposing Pol Pot were tortured out of people.  Every person who entered these doors for ‘interrogation’, an estimated 17,000, ended up dead, except seven.

As I walk through the rooms and the halls, it is hard to get a sense that this used to be a place of education and growth.  The rooms still have some of the remnants of torture and there are photos of how the rooms looked with dead bodies in them the day the Vietnamese arrived and liberated Phnom Penh.

Solitary confinement cells.

I am amazed that the museum hasn’t become very commercial.  It certainly has changed.  There are more displays and updated information.  But no gaudy gift shops or harassing hawkers.  They have taken great to care to ensure the grounds are kept quiet and respected.

There are four main buildings in Tuol Sleng.  The museum still has the displays of photographs of formers prisoners and former workers.  There are also the rooms with the beds the prisoners were strapped to.  There are the torture mechanisms, such as the waterboarding apparatus.  And rooms of endless solitary confinement cells. 

The new additions are fascinating.  There is a room highlighting the former leaders of Tuol Sleng and the current status of their trials for crimes against humanity.  There is a photo display with confessions from former S-21 workers. 

Photos of former prisoners.

One of the confessions of the former S-21 workers highlights the difficulty in achieving closure from this period in history for Cambodians.  The former worker basically said that he had no regrets about what he did at S-21.  He knows many people died, but he doesn’t regret how he contributed to it.  He did his job.  He did what he was told to do.  If he didn’t, he would have been killed.  So, in aiding in the killing of others, he survived.  In his eyes, he is a victim too.  On top of that, he is not being charged with any crimes.  He was a kid when this happened.  He now lives like all other Cambodians.  Free.  No accountability or punishment for what he did.

The hardest part in achieving closure from what occurred during Pol Pot’s regime is finding a place to direct the anger and hold the responsible parties accountable.  While there are a handful of people who have been arrested and are on trial for crimes against humanity, most people do not believe they will actually be held responsible.  The most culpable off all people, Pol Pot, died quietly in his bed with his wife by his side in 1998.  He was never held accountable.  Many believe the same will happen to the few who are currently on trial.  They are old and the proceedings are moving slowly.  The Khmer Rouge fell in 1979.  32 years ago.  And to this day, not a single verdict has been handed down.  No Cambodian has received closure yet.

The Buddhist stupa.

While some people did die within the walls of Tuol Sleng, most were taken to the Choeung Elk extermination center, better known as The Killing Fields.  This is our second and last stop of the day.  As we pull up to the gate of The Killing Fields, it is obvious it has changed since I was here in 2002.  There is a new huge gate, walls enclosing the area, paved walkway, a place to buy food, drinks, souvenirs.  Thankfully, just like S-21, Choeung Elk is still very quiet and solemn.  Not much talking at all.  Not much noise.

The Killing Fields is like Tuol Sleng.  A very heavy place.  This place has a bit of a different vibe though.  You can certainly feel the death, but it isn’t as dark here.  It isn’t as sinister.  Perhaps that is because it is open-air and there is green grass growing up through the mass graves.  A metaphor for healing?  I don’t know.  It is really hard to wrap my mind around what happened here.

The centerpiece of The Killing Fields is the Buddhist stupa.  Standing several stories tall, it has many layers that are filled with skulls, bones and clothes from the people exhumed from the mass graves.  Off to one side is a museum with photos and facts about Choeung Elk and a screening room for a documentary about the extermination center.

The mass graves.

Walking around The Killing Fields is surreal and eerie.  The mass graves look like nothing more than big dents in the ground.  A few are protected by a railing, but many are open and you can easily walk right through them.  Thankfully, people don’t.  As a result, there are well-worn footpaths between the graves. 

One thing that makes Choeung Elk even more disturbing is the manner in which the people were killed.  The Khmer Rouge didn’t want to waste any bullets or ammunition.  There were no firing squads.  The people were stabbed or their throats slit and then pushed into the mass graves.  The babies were often grabbed by the ankles and swung like baseball bats into a tree and then tossed into the graves.

As we walk on the paths between the graves, there are clothes and bones and teeth rising to the surface from the rains.  It is almost impossible not to step on them at some point.  It is obvious this is not something that occurred in the distant past.  This is very recent.  Within my lifetime.  The wounds are still fresh.

Skulls inside the stupa.

Cambodia sticks out from Laos and my experience in Vietnam when I was here last time.  Now that I have the comparison of the countries in the region, it is easier to connect the dots and understand the effects of someone like Pol Pot.

There seems to be a lack of education in certain aspects of Cambodia.  That is not an insult, simply an observation.  The people are amazing and nice.  But the way some things are done makes you question them.  For example, the trip from Laos to Cambodia, where we switched vans and were crammed into a much smaller van in Cambodia and had to deal with the scam.  That was definitely not the right way to do things.  But these kids, and they are young, were extremely nice.  They just haven’t been educated and taught the right way to do things.  They are just trying to make money.  The towns are crawling with tuk-tuk drivers.  Too many that the current number of tourists can’t keep them all employed.  But, it takes no education to be a tuk-tuk driver.  An older, wiser generation has not explained the value of higher education to the younger generations.  And for a long time there was no older, wiser generation to teach them.

Bones rising up on the walk paths.

Vietnam, as a result of the war and geography, had in influx of money and resources.  With its intelligence, it has progressed at a rapid pace it can handle properly.  Laos is at a huge disadvantage geographically, but it understands its potential in the tourism industry and has the wisdom to progress at a pace it can handle.  Cambodia also sees its potential in the tourism industry.  Plus, it is geographically better off than Laos since it sits between two well-developed countries (Thailand and Vietnam) and has a small coastline.  However, it is progressing at a pace that the people are having a hard time handling.  The education and guidance isn't there.  There is an attitude of get what you can while you can.

This is all a result of Pol Pot’s efforts to ‘cleanse’ the country of approximately 2.5 million people.  It is a very sad reality and hard to know where to begin to fix it.

We hop back in the tuk-tuk and head back to the hotel area.  A quick bite to eat and we are in for the night.  Certainly one of the heaviest days we have had on the trip.

Solemnly yours,

Kevin

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HAPPY KHMER NEW YEAR!!

Day 24, April 14^th

Battambang done.  Time to mosey on down the trail.  As I stated before, I made the ‘rational’ destination choice, Phnom Penh.  ‘Rational’ isn’t my typical M.O.  But Phnom Penh is it.  I need more time to figure out the beach options.

The three of us meet for a nice rooftop breakfast before the bus for Phnom Penh arrives.  Naturally, I am the last to the lobby.  I pay for the rooms and we hop on the transport to the bus station.  A few minutes later we are at the bus station and must say goodbye to Battambang.  This was probably one of the smoothest cities we have been to.  Probably one of the better times we have had too.

A four-seater.

The ride to Phnom Penh is an easy slow roll up the road.  One interesting thing on this ride, actually on every overland ride we have been on in Southeast Asia, is the traffic.  Initially, it looks chaotic, unorganized and dangerous.  No one is stopping at red lights or intersections.  Every level of transportation can go anywhere.  Huge busses.  Mini busses.  Cars.  Motorbikes.  Bicycles.  They all go everywhere.  Highways.  Back roads.  Dirt roads.  Alleys.  Weaving in and out of each other.  I’m always waiting for a wreck.  But it never happens.  There are no rigid traffic laws in this region.  Just traffic suggestions.  And the suggestion is if someone is coming at you in a bigger automobile than you are in, they suggest you get out of the way. 

Typically for the farm, but goes anywhere.

Once you step back and look at the way their traffic works, it makes sense and is highly efficient.  It isn’t stop and start.  It is a rhythmic, fluid motion that is made possible by the demeanor of the people in the region.  Patient.  Calm.  It is like an organism in constant motion.  This would never work in the U.S.  We drive with too much aggression and impatience.  There is no such thing as road rage here.  Once I was able to wrap my head around how the traffic works here, it is pretty impressive.

After a quick five hours on the road, mixed in with a couple of ‘rest stops’, we arrive in Phnom Penh.

Phnom Penh is one of the cities in Southeast Asia I made it to back in 2002.  Just in the time it takes the bus to drive into town and to the area we are staying, I can tell this town has changed quite a bit.  Built up.  More money all around.  Businesses.  Traffic.  Tourists. 

Public transportation.

We hit the bus station.  Employ a tuk-tuk.  Get to a restaurant.  Lunch.  Ditch the kids.  Hoof it to locate lodging.

I find a place called Paddy Rice Irish Pub with a restaurant on top.  I know, an Irish place in Cambodia.  The main selling point for me is the manager here, a cool Canadian.  This is the first place where we can communicate with a hotel staffer whose first language it English.  Not that that is imperative, but we are in Phnom Penh during an interesting time, the Khmer New Year.  We have heard a lot of different reports of what to expect, and judging so far, most have been wrong.  The new year in Southeast Asia is suppose to be huge, crazy, with lots of water guns.  We’ve seen people preparing for it.  Huge animals slow roasting on a spit.  Colorful decorations.  This is going to be a big deal.  Or so we thought.  The town seems empty.

View from the front window of the VIP bus.

Our situation is we need to know what to expect with the New Year, if the things we want to see in Phnom Penh are open and what are the possibilities with transportation to the next town.  The Khmer New Year stretches out 3-4 days and will affect all of these things.  The Canadian has been here for about 10 years and he should know the skinny.  Any kind of language issues could cost us precious travel days.  I choose the Paddy Rice and the Canadian manager to eliminate that possibility.

I round up the kids and we check in.  Immediately, Patton starts inspecting the room.  Lights.  Hot water.  A/C.  Crap!  The heat in Phnom Penh is suffocating and the A/C isn’t sufficiently cooling him.  We are in serious danger of another hot flash and there are no hand wipes in site. 

A quick call to the staff and a girl brings in a fan.  It really does no good and we can tell, Patton isn’t happy.  But, to his credit, he says no worries.  He’s gonna try it Pyle-style.  Just gonna go with the flow.  That is the most non-flow going with the flow I have ever seen.  We’ll see how long that lasts.

Constant motionly yours,

The Rabbit 

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